The Chameleon


How many of us have fallen prey to doing something to impress someone or to make them feel more comfortable? Probably most of us…

While it is wonderful to do things for others and be kind, this attitude at its extreme can backfire on you and the person you are trying to impress. Throughout my life, I have had this habit of being a chameleon. This can be a positive trait because chameleon’s adjust to their surroundings and adapt well. BUT, being too much of a chameleon is not healthy because you can easily lose yourself while adapting to those around you.

At times I can be so adaptable that I adjust/change who I am to match the energy of other people. I do this partly to relate to people deeply and connect with them, but partly it is for myself to appear like-able and make the other person feel more comfortable. Without realizing, this neutral approach prevents us from revealing our true selves to other people and therefore, we cannot genuinely and fully connect with others. Let’s use dating for an example…what if two people are together, but they’re both trying to put up a front to impress the other person? They may be kindred spirits or they may not be compatible, but they will never find out unless they show their true selves.

When you hide your true colors and pretend to be like everyone else, others who share the same kindred spirit, won’t recognize that you’re a fellow unicorn. No, not everyone will like you or show you the love that you crave and that’s okay…the people who are meant to be in your life will come to you and stay if you remain true to yourself and open yourself up to love. So show them your real stripes, yes, your scars too, wear your colors boldly and with pride, and you will be set free! 


For my Oma

I see you in the flowers, I feel your presence in the cool breeze across my face, I see you in the trees, I feel your love in the warm rays of sunlight, I hear you in the crunch of dirt below my footsteps…

In the great outdoors is where I feel closest to you. It is here where I feel your loving arms around me and your cheerful gaze with me always.

“Find out who you are and do it on purpose.”

-Dolly Parton

2 thoughts on “The Chameleon

  1. Angela Zuidema

    Hola Manders, Amen! Being true, being authentic, being genuine to yourself and everyone you meet in life should be our life long journey in this outer and inner world. You are wise beyond your years. So go ahead be fearless, be loving and show the Real you (with the big R as Marianne Williamson would say) to the world. Lovingly yours always, mommy

    Liked by 1 person

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